I believe I have a gift for Googling. I can out Google most people I know for information. So, I've decided to provide some links at the bottom of my rambling blogs. If you do not have the time or attention span for my blog then please check out my links, they may be helpful.
I'm a bit A.D.D., okay so this is not an official diagnosis. I've never been officially diagnosed, but I have three children and my oldest was diagnosed with A.D.D. and my middle and youngest child have A.D.H.D. They have all been officially diagnosed and are all in therapy. Only one of the children is on medication and it's Strattera a non-stimulant medication. It is one she must take constantly because it does have to build up in the system.
I've never been diagnosed but since all my children have a form of this learning disorder I can assume that I have it as well. Also, there is the fact that during my childhood the possibility that I had this did come up. I'm not sure who brought it to the attention of my mother, a teacher or doctor, but when my mother told my father he of course declared no child of his could have some mental disorder. Back then A.D.D. wasn't as common as it is now and people thought of it as some sort of retardation.
Once upon a time I was talking with a young girl’s great-grandma on the playground at the kids' school. The girl's mother was my age (I know this because she was a former classmate) and she was in prison for whatever the reason, and apparently the grand-mother was minus her maternal instincts (hence the reason the daughter was in prison). So the great-grandmother was raising the girl. This young girl had a lot of issues, she acted much younger than all of the others in her class and I believe she had issues with toilet training all the way up to second grade.
I talked to this great-grandma and she got a hushed tone and mentioned how she'd heard that one of the kids in the class had A.D.H.D. She said it was as if she thought the child was perhaps mentally challenged. I informed her that my child has this learning disability as well and was doing famously; previously the great-grandma had mentioned how much better my daughter was doing than her great-granddaughter.
It's just sad that this child will probably suffer first because of her situation and because her great-grandmother is sort of prejudice against anything regarding a psychological problem.
At times I want to rail against my own father for having the same sort of prejudice, because he never got any sort of treatment for me. Even as he was complaining to me with the diagnosis of my middle child (the first one to be diagnosed) because I refused to put her on medication after a bad round of stimulant medication. He told me that when you have a child you do anything and everything for that child... yes dad you do! Dad doesn't quite understand that there isn't a cure all for A.D.H.D. it's not like applying a band-aid for a wound.
I don't tell my father I'm upset that he didn't get me the help I need in my childhood, but it has been in my head before, especially when we were in an argument about medicating my daughter. Don't get me wrong I love my father dearly and he did a great job raising me (mostly along with mother). I do not blame him for my lot in life, everything I have or don't have rests entirely on my shoulders. I don't blame anyone else because I don't like it when others carry around their childhood trauma like some sort of get out of jail free card, so I cannot do that myself.
I do at times wish that I'd had some of the help my children now have, perhaps school wouldn't have been such a struggle for me and perhaps life wouldn't continue to be a struggle now.
With A.D.D. the most important thing is a strict routine and organization, but the very essence of Attention Deficit Disorder is disorganization and lack of structure such as a routine. We are flighty and lose concentration easily.
In this weigh loss battle it is so easy for me to lose interest, to not have the results in the time frame. Basically I want to wake up tomorrow and have the body I did in high school!! Yes, don't us all.
I need to set up a menu plan for nutritional meals. I also need an exercise plan. In the back of my head I've had a thought of setting up a meal plan for the week, but with no real follow through, this goes the same for exercise. I want to have an exercise routine with which I do cardio three days a week and strength training two days per week, but yet again I have no real follow through to implement these plans.
Since the beginning of the year I've made two purchases, one actual bike and one stationary recumbent bike. Right after buying the actual bike, I rode it twice and then we were hit with like 2 feet of snow, since then I haven't ridden the bike.
I have used the recumbent bike, but it doesn’t lead to very much calories burned. I’m not sure why but a basic stationary bike will burn more calories than a recumbent bike, I guess you have to pay for comfort.
I know what I need to do, but implementing these things seems hard. Then I also fear that if I do set up a successful routine what happens if (when) I find a job. I’m currently unemployed due to a lay off and I worry if I do get a routine going then two seconds later it all goes to hell.
Though I’ll say I’d rather have a job than a routine.
I just wish I could step out of my own way and do this weight loss thing. I so need to be healthier. I’m just struggling right now.
Related links: http://www.keepkidshealthy.com/welcome/conditions/adhd.html
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